Live and let live

 Live and let live

An old adage ‘A man is a social animal’ has been coming to my mind for the last few days.I have been compelled by my mind to give it a serious thought.We exist in a society.We all need the society as much as the society needs us.It is a  case of give and take,  mutual trust and understanding.Some people adopt the ‘I don’t care’ attitude,but at some stage of their life they come to terms with reality.The question arises  after all what comprises human relations. Human relations as I understand ,is the  interaction  between  individuals .This interaction can be  at the level of:

1. among  the  family  members 2.neighbours  3.work place  associates  and  4.society  at  large  which includes relatives and friends.

 No  one can survive without communication. For  the  water  that we drink,  the delectable food on our dining table , the house  that we live in and  hundreds of luxuries that we enjoy  are the result of  mutual  human involvement.  Even  a  hermit,  living in seclusion, is indirectly the beneficiary  of the labour  of others.   

 We learn our first lesson of maintaining  good will from our family. If a family is well knit and has a positive outlook, it will be transmitted to the members. Here the Mother’s role is very significant.It  is the mother who has to inculcate   good values

 in the children.The concept of  tolerance, concern for the feelings of others  and to a  large extent selflessness  and good behaviour  and co-operation  is acquired by the children  in their early years . These  values get ingrained  in their system. The mother ,therefore,  is  a psychologist, who can  effectively  judge the emotions of her  household.  The  Mother  is the  first and foremost  teacher.

 Next  comes the School. The school plays a very important part  in the development of the child.  The character  building process starts within the boundary of the school.The qualities of  sharing,  give and take  and shouldering responsibility  are acquired at the school level. It is within  the precincts of  the school  that the qualities of  head and heart  and  discipline are imbibed in the individual  and  equip   him to face the challenges  of   life.  Education  will not be   complete if the child is not  exposed to the vagaries  of  the harsh world.  It is generally noticed  that the  children who have not  taken  any  formal education are by nature  not very  co-operative   and do not possess a very pleasing disposition. The  habits that we have acquired in childhood in our school  and college  always remain with us. In fact these experiences form  the basis  of human relations.  Education  leads us to the royal path of virtues   like  equanimity,  good will  and  fellow feeling.         

 As we grow  we   come across various characters,  young and old,  pleasant and not so   pleasant, fun loving and morose. We have to tackle  them  all. Human  nature varies from person to person. We have to adjust  with every one. I  have  come across  characters  of all sorts during the course of my professional life. Dealing  with  human beings enabled  me   to  judge the natural  bent of mind  of individuals  to a great extent.The test of  a person’s credibility  in maintaining harmony starts from home.We have many times noticed  that  some people  who  show exemplary behaviour ,have a co operative  approach  and are very helpful  to others in the outside world  are  dictators at home.They are intolerant  and  virtually  abusive  and insensitive   towards the feelings and  requirements of their own family. Such  persons    are   utter failures  in  life. If we are good  within  the four walls of our home,   it is beamed  on our  face  and personality. We are all familiar with the saying that   charity begins at home.But at the same time it should not end there.

 While browsing through the Internet I chanced to see a formulation  titled ‘Ten  Commandments of Human Relations”. I am reproducing it below for ready reference  and emulation. Here I also acknowledge my indebtedness  to the author of this  Happiness formula :

10 Commandments of Human Relations Speak to people. There is nothing as nice as a cheerful word of greeting. Smile at people. It takes 72 muscles to frown, only 14 to smile. Call people by name. The sweetest music to anyone's ears is the sound of his own name. Be friendly and helpful.If you want friends, you must be one. Be cordial.Speak and act as if everything you do is a joy to you. Be genuinely interested in people.You can like almost everybody if you try. Be generous with praise...and cautious with criticisms. Be considerate with the feelings of others.There are usually three sides to a controversy: Yours, the other fellow's and the right side. Be eager to lend a helping hand.Often it is appreciated more than you know. Add to this:a good sense of humor, a huge dose of patience and a dash of humility. This combination will open many doors and the rewards will be enormous.

Welcome old age or is  it  golden age!! The beauty of childhood and the glory of  youth has given way to quietitude and tranquillity of  old age.Looking backward I see not only a life of  fulfilment and success but  also that of trials and tribulations. The arrival of old age  has unfolded  new hopes and aspirations of a kind never  experienced before.Our life is now  more regulated.We find pleasure in things which we never even noticed  before. We have all the time in the world to  give fruition to  our hobbies and desires  lying beneath our  subconscious mind.
       I spoke to some oldies  to know their views about ageing.Majority of the people feel that they are now relaxed and at peace with themselves. I remember Somerset Maugham's  words,
'Old age has its pleasures,which though different,are not less than the pleasures of youth'.It has been observed that  as we grow older, we become more tolerant;we acquire the ability to control our emotions  much more notably than when we were young.The transition from youth  to old age is much more smooth  than we anticipated.A very unique  feeling of  spiritual  glory overtakes an individual.The vision of the God Almighty which  brings harmony and a sense of surrender  is  visible. This is not to say that  in a youth  there are no such emotions but  with the passing of years this affinity   with the Supreme comes to the fore.
   There is no doubt that physical infirmities slowly  make their way and take charge of the human body.One has to be  fortunate  to  be spared of the onslaught  of these irritants. Fading vision ,  hearing capacity   diminishing, and weakening of  joints  are common ailments of old age.In olden days such problems might have prevented people  from performing their daily  activities but  now  prompt and effective  medication is available at affordable  price and do not in any way become a hurdle in performing   daily chores. Now is the time to observe and enjoy the wonders of nature, little birds twittering ,squirrels running at jet speed and  hordes  of  monkeys descending  from no where and disturbing the  flora and fauna  of the neighbourhood!! In our  younger  times where was the time  to even notice  such  captivating and bewitching sights.A saying by a famous poet' Sans eyes, sans teeth, sans every thing', no longer holds true in  the modern age.
 Most important  factor at this age  is  family bonding which tend to get  strengthened  in old age. In our youth we were so much engrossed  in our profession that  we  could hardly pamper and  cuddle  our children.  We were more concerned about  teaching them good manners and  disciplining them.  Now when  we are  old we are more indulgent towards our grand children. Every move and every action of our grand children  thrills us .The roles are now reversed. In fact  they   decide and dictate and  we don't have the heart to disappoint them!! To maintain  harmony  and peace we allow our children  to have their  own space and  privacy. They are where we were once! They must have the liberty to manage their affairs.
         It  is unfortunate that  in some households harmonious relations  are not maintained. On one side the aged parents  feel neglected  and on the other side the children   treat   their  own parents as  a  burden. Generally  lack of understanding and adjustment lead  to such a situation. In fact both sides  need counselling.
  I  must end with a happy note that old age  is melodious and  not malicious.




















      

From my kitchen diary 17

To day  I intend to make sandwiches ,which I  had taken  yesterday,The sandwiches were so yummy that I HAVE to share the recipe with friends. The sandwiches were made by my  talented grand daughter, Ramita. Once I had made Sandwiches,  and she had  named   them Dadi special sandwiches.. Today in appreciation, I am naming these as Rom's Special  Surprise.

Ingredients:

1.Breadslices  8

 2   Cheese spread  4 tbsps.

3.   Capsicum       1    (cut into small pieces and squeezed)

4.  Tomato     1 medium size (cut intosmall pieces  and squeezed)

 5. Corn        1 tbsp

6.  Olives       4  (crushed)

7. Tomato Ketchup 1 tbsp

8.  Oregano  1 pinch

9   Salt  as per taste

10   Pepper  1/4 tsp

11  Basil leaves  2

12. Butter  1 tsp

Method

The sandwiches can be grilled or  taken as simple  sandwiches.If you want them simple, you may cut the sides of the slices  otherwise the slices may be taken  as they are.

In a  bowl  put the ingredients (s. no.1 to  s .no 11).Make a paste by mixing  lightly. On one side of a bread put very little butter and the other side spread the paste evenly.  Press lightly. Cut them in any shape you like  or  keep them for grilling, till they are brown and crisp. Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grand son becomes a Doctor

Today is a great day.The year 2012 is coming  to an end in the next few hours...Reflecting on the by gone days and years, one becomes  nostalgic .Today my grand son has become a Doctor. My memory races twenty two years  backward. That was the day, when my daughter  became a doctor.Time has come a full circle. Today The  31st December 2012 her  son has become a Doctor. Several years ago  I contemplated to go for a Doctor's degree,but could not achieve my goal. My daughter and grand son  have successfully reached  the destination which  I could not. They have  in a way brought my dreams  come alive. My blessings are with them.Incidentally I may state my son-in -law too, is a very efficient  doctor.
                                        Tejas, my grand son,  has always been a studious child. As the saying goes,'coming events cast, their shadow before', Tejas was a brilliant student right from his Nursery/KG  and showed signs of achieving greater heights.  Besides studies  he  is an achiever in debates and  quiz competitions. He also has a flare for writing. He has made the whole family proud.We wish him  all SUCCESS in life.

Welcoming the new year 2013

 Welcoming the  new year

  The new year has arrived.I wish all my friends and well wishers a very happy New Year 2013 . The dawn of new year will bring new aspirations, new hopes and new expectations. As the new year arrives,we too turn a new leaf  in our life.Come out of the humdrum of daily life and plan for the year ahead.Let the new year  bring new beginnings. The year of 2012  is gone .It is now part of History and hidden in the womb of  mother Earth. So welcome the year 2013 with open  arms. I quote the words of  Ann Landers,” Let this coming year  be better than others.Vow to do some  of the things  you’ve always wanted to do but could’nt find time to do.” Once again HAPPY NEW YEAR .

 Pics courtesy Google

smile a while

A wordless Wednesday.Shhhhh. Don't disturb!

                          Have    you  ever  felt     tired   like this ?

                       Now  you can smile   ha,ha,ha,ha.

From my kitchen diary part 16

In winter months every one loves to have  some thing hot in the cosy comfort of their room..The question arises what to take.  In our house we love to have hot soup.I will share with my friends a recipe of a soup, which is relished by every body at home. During winter months fresh corn is not available. Of course we get  tinned corn .We can  use it but many people do not  like the  smell of tinned corn.I have found a way out.I use popcorns to prepare soup.Believe me it turns out to be as tasty as fresh  corn soup. 

Ingredients :

1Popcorn    2cups

2.Mushrooms   i/4 cup

3.Carrot and beans   1/4 cup

4.Salt        To taste.

5.Pepper powder   to taste

6.Butter      4 teaspoons

7.Refined flour  2 teaspoons

Method of preparation;

Cut  the carrots,beans and mushrooms into small  uniform pieces.Saute them in 2 tsps of butter. Remove from the fire when done.Keep aside. Boil popcorns in three cups of water in a pressure cooker. After two whistles remove from the fire. Sieve  the cooked popcorns in a soup strainer. Now put 2 tsps butter in a karhai and add the flour. Stir it for  a minute and add the boiled popcorn and   carrots,beans and mushrooms.  Add salt and pepper powder.Boil it well till the  it thickens. Remove from the fire.We can boil till  it gets the desired consistency.Serve piping hot.