welcoming a daughter in law

In my last post I had written about my Daughter's marriage.Since I am a Punjabi and my husband is a Keralite we follow both North ans South traditions and customs. Whereas we celebrate Diwali, Holi and other festivals we also  celebrate Onam and Vishu in the same spirit and fervour.We relish Paranthas, Paneer, Sarson ka Saag as much as Idli, Dosa, Avial and Eressery with same enthusiasm. We have friends not only from Punjab but also from Kerala. We speak Hindi, English and Malyalam at home.
                           Right  from their childhood we planned that one  of our children should marry  a  Punjabi and the other one a Malyali.Even though when the children grew up we never discussed our plan with them., it was God's will that the Daughter( J ) married a Punjabi (J )and the Son(D) got a wife (K)from Kerala.On one visit we had met K and liked her but bringing her as a DIL never struck us. As it is a belief  'marriages are made in Heaven',we got a proposal  of marriage for our Son  from Kerala  from the same girl's  Father. We were more than happy. Of  course every thing depended on the boy and  the girl.Their opinion mattered the most. The girl came to Delhi with her Father. D and K met  and liked each other. It was decided that marriage ceremony would be performed in Guruvayur Temple, Kerala. 
It was the year 1988. We booked tickets for Trichur. Many of our relatives  also accompanied us.  From Trichur we went to Guruvayur in cars.  A guesthouse had been booked for us. In the evening many of our relatives(my in-laws) arrived.Singing, dancing and merry making, everyone was in a festive  spirit. All men were clad in Mundus in typical malyali style. My brother-in-law, Vishwash Nath, who is a Punjabi to the core wore the Mundu and nothing on top. In a hilarious mood he went on proclaiming that his name was Vishwanathan.
   The Muhuratham was at 9 a.m. the next day.My daughter and niece had brought mehandi from Delhi to apply on K's hand. Both of them went to her room.She was fully decked . Her friends and relatives were apprehensive that her dress was likely to be spoiled.  But these two had their way. Mehandi  looked very beautiful in her  hands. It added radiance to her personality and face. 
All of us assembled in the Mandapam of the Temple. Several couples  were scheduled to marry that day. The Hall was full  of people. There was a rostrum in the centre of the Hall. From this rostrum the couples can have a Darshan of Lord Guruvayoorappan.  The Kerala marriage ceremony takes hardly five minutes to complete, unlike a  Punjabi marriage ceremony. The bride and bride groom have to walk  around a lamp(Vilaku)three times. No mantras  are recited. The groom ties a Tali(A symbol of a married lady) round the brides neck. They exchanged  garlands. The priest told them to pray and take blessings from God! (Tozhu) This turned out to be a funny situation. D did not know Malyalam. He looked blank. The bride whispered in his ears  to pray. 
After the marriage ceremony was over all the guests assembled in a hall of the guest house. Some more rituals were performed. The Hall was tastefully decorated with coconut and banana festoons.(thoranum)  All the relatives gave spoonful of banana mashed in milk to the couple as blessings for a happy wedded life. In the end there was Sadya(feast) consisting of Kerala delicacies.
 Next day we left for Delhi. Before the bride entered the house she was welcomed inside according to traditional customs. We are proud of our DIL. She is like a daughter. She is very lovable and has taken the responsibility  of the whole house. She is a perfectionist. After her arrival the fusion of North and South  is complete. God bless her!